Deb Perelman, a successful cookbook author and creator of Smitten Kitchen, tends to focus her social media posts on her work, such as pasta recipes or chocolate chip cookies. However, days after the Hamas attack on Israel, she described the violence as “repugnant” on Instagram and expressed horror at “the death and destruction that will affect both sides.” Later, she posted about her newborn niece and a day of apple picking with her children. Her direct messages immediately filled with angry responses.
“How can you post a couple of paragraphs and then continue talking about apple pies? You’re Jewish,” a user commented. Another questioned why she had “never had a conscience remorse” about the “70 years of brutal occupation.” Someone else demanded that she comment more and added that Perelman looked “exactly like one of the hostages in Gaza who are being tortured and raped.”
“The outrage in my direct messages was unprecedented,” Perelman said in an interview, adding that before she spoke out about the attacks, she had already received a flood of messages criticizing her “silence.” “There was a feeling that I was condoning genocide, that I didn’t call it genocide when it happened, or that I didn’t use incendiary enough language.”
People working in various industries—from influential online celebrities to those with much less prominent online profiles, including people who teach yoga, interior design, technology, and real estate—said in interviews that they faced the expectation to share their opinions on the war. The pressure comes from their friends and followers, whether explicitly or subtly. Many see silence as a stance in itself.
However, they stated that they realized that posting something about it came at a price, such as expressions of outrage and personal attacks, among other reactions. It is particularly complex for people like Perelman, whose livelihood depends on constantly posting about topics that usually don’t touch on politics.
Some people who have publicly responded to the war, especially in support of a Palestinian state, have faced professional repercussions, including members of student groups at Harvard University, whose personal data was publicly exposed when they published an open letter blaming Israel after the Hamas attacks. The editor of Artforum was fired after the magazine’s staff published an open letter supporting Palestinian liberation, and the editor-in-chief of Harper’s Bazaar faced calls to resign after saying that cutting off water and electricity to civilians in Gaza was “the most inhumane thing I have ever seen in my life.” She later apologized.
“You see a lot of posts and videos saying, ‘Your silence is deafening,’ and it’s very difficult to respond to that,” said 24-year-old Phoebe Lind, who works at an energy startup in Washington. She has not yet shared her opinions on the war online, but she is considering doing so.
Of course, many people consider it extremely important to post a comment about the war on social media. Doing so shows support for the affected communities and can educate their followers, perhaps influencing decision-makers and helping process complex emotions.
Social media accounts have often focused on important news events before. However, the Israeli-Palestinian conflict is a uniquely thorny and polarizing topic to comment on online, especially for those who are unfamiliar with the region and its history or who are still forming their opinions.
Maddie Coppola, a 25-year-old interior designer from New York who often uses Instagram to follow design trends and discover new restaurants, mentioned that she has avoided getting involved in social media debates because she has had difficulty finding reliable information about the conflict and feels that her own views are evolving. She is also concerned about causing rifts among friends or colleagues with her posts.
“I don’t want to bring this into my professional life. You have to be very careful, especially when you don’t feel like you know much about what’s going on,” Coppola said.
For some, the complexity and magnitude of the conflict can seem almost impossible to summarize in Instagram and X posts. Many feel that their friends or family want them to post or share some indication of their political leanings, but they claim that whatever they decide to share would not capture the depth of their emotions or viewpoints.
“The current debate on the issue feels very reductionist,” said Andrey Romanov, who works in the communications department for a university. “There is no room for nuance.”
Nazhath Faheema, a Muslim woman who works for an interfaith charity in Singapore, said she was deeply aware of the impact of the conflict on Muslim and Jewish communities. She recounted that people from both religions were asking her to post about the war on social media and sending her graphic images. Faheema, 38, said that some users had trolled her by asking, “Are you even Muslim?”
Faheema chose to write a post about her decision to keep her opinions private while taking the time to process her emotions.
“I cannot put into words the pain I have endured” in deciding to post about the issue, she said. “Worrying about which friend will no longer be my friend, worrying about who will attack me, and even wondering, will people think I’m just a bad person?”
The speed at which social media cycles move can create pressure to post news about events just hours after they occur, sometimes before many facts about what happened are known. This is complicated by the fact that on Facebook and Instagram, the Stories feature disappears after 24 hours, prompting people to keep posting new content.
“Places like Instagram are not designed for activism; they are designed for people to engage with ads so that corporations can make money,” said Minaa B., a social worker and writer with over 270,000 followers on Instagram, who uses that name professionally. “The goal is for you to keep posting and stay engaged through continuous posting.”
“It’s not a space for nuance,” she said, adding that she did not make posts about the war. “It’s not a space that usually fosters healthy dialogue in a conversation.”
Seeing the negative reaction that those who have openly shared their opinion have received, some social media users are making frank posts in the hope that members of their online communities will feel safer and more comfortable revealing their own views.
“Many people on LinkedIn don’t speak up because they think, ‘Oh, this is a professional network,'” said 37-year-old Agneez Kang, who is job hunting after working in the retail sector. Kang uses her LinkedIn profile to express her concern about civilian deaths in Gaza, which she believes is important as a “woman of color.”
“I posted my comment knowing that it could affect my job prospects,” Kang added. “I don’t want to work for a company that does not value freedom of speech and will penalize me for talking about an important issue.”
Perelman said she does not regret commenting on the conflict. She noted that in this social environment, “if people are going to be angry with me for something they think I think, I’d rather they be angry with me for things I actually think.”
Perelman shared her experience with hate messages on Instagram and used it as a call to donate to World Central Kitchen, a global nonprofit organization that delivers freshly prepared meals to those in need during crises, raising over $180,000. Perelman stated that, for her, it showed that people wanted to channel their impotent and frustrated energy into something positive.